There are people who don’t like parties. They’re lovely people, but I’m afraid this blog post won’t have much to say about them. Instead, it’s about the oft-missed and crucial fact that there are two separate but equally important groups of partiers: the party throwers and the partygoers.
Too often, these groups get conflated. It’s assumed that if you like parties, you like parties–as simple as that. That’s a rookie mistake. Of course, both the partygoers and the party throwers love parties. They enjoy them enough that a partygoer might, in a moment of desperation, throw one, just to make sure it happens; and a party thrower might go to someone else’s on occasion, because it turns out most people insist on throwing their own birthday parties even when you offer to do it for them. But going to a party and throwing a party, when you think about it, actually take much, much different skills. And parties really hum when the two groups find one another and each play their proper role.
Steph and I are party throwers, and pretty much our favorite people in the world are partygoers. As people who likes to host parties, there’s nothing quite so enjoyable, reassuring, and affirming as knowing there’s a group of people we can depend on to show up and have a good time at whatever party we throw. If we’re talking about the barebone basics of a good party, really all you need is a party thrower and two or three partygoers. But it seldom stops there. If you’ve got a strong team of party throwers and partygoers, they have a way of making sure the room is full and the party is hopping.
Party throwers create the atmosphere. They plan the menu. They do the shopping and the cooking. They tend to make way too much food. They make sure the platters are well-stocked and the drinks are filled. They’re most comfortable behind the bar. If you have way more glasses than your own use can explain, you’re probably a party thrower.
The partygoers show up, and they usually stay awhile. They often get the party started, and they usually make it last. They try everything, and tell everyone how good it is. They have a full glass. They jump into the theme of the party with both feet. They have a way of keeping the conversation going, of drawing other people in, and of somehow emanating the feeling, ‘Isn’t this a great time?’ Are your weekends usually booked? You’re probably a partygoer. If you find yourself stacking up more than one party per night, it’s a sure thing.
Want a great party?
Really all it takes is figuring out whether you’re a partygoer or a party thrower. Don’t feel guilty if honestly, deep down you like your parties better than other people’s, or alternatively if you are always over at your friend’s house and never inviting them to yours. Embrace your role–revel in it, even–and find a partner or two of the other variety. Set a date. Invite a few other people over. And, there you go, a good time will be had all. It’s practically guaranteed.
Recipe of the Party–Pumpkin Lasagna
- 4 slices of bacon
- 1/2 lb fresh mushrooms
- 1 small onion (chopped)
- 1 15 oz can pumpkin
- 1/2 cup half and half
- 1 teaspoon sage
- 9 lasagna noodles
- 1 cup ricotta cheese
- 1 cup mozzarella
- 1 cup Parmesan
Cook the noodles. Meanwhile, sauté the bacon, onion, and mushrooms until the vegetables are tender. Combine the pumpkin, cream, and sage. Add salt and pepper to taste. Layer noodles, pumpkin sauce, mushroom mixture, and cheese until you run out of space or ingredients.
Bake at 375 degrees for 45 minutes.